Does God Care How I Feel?
Updated: May 19, 2020
“Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone?"
But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things, but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:40-41, ESV)
I rolled over and turned the alarm off, fighting the urge to tuck my head under the covers and stay there all day. The previous day was the first Mother’s Day since I became a mom that I was not with any of my kids, or with my own mother or mother-in-law.
Even though I truly felt thankful for the blessings of my kids, and that I could “Zoom” call them, I couldn’t seem to shake the sadness I felt.
As the day wore on, I tried to “fix” my mood with all of my usual coping strategies like exercise, sitting out in the sun, eating chocolate, praying, and even cleaning – not necessarily in that order :).
Then on top of feeling sad and lonely, I piled on a load of guilt. I “shouldn’t” feel this way because I have so much to be thankful for, so many women have it worse off, or are unable to have children.
I wondered if God really cared about how I was feeling. Did He want me to paste on a smile and work myself out of this depressed mood?
At some point I sensed God wanted me to stop. Stop trying to fix it myself.
Like Martha in Luke 10:40, my busyness and trying to rid myself of uncomfortable feelings was getting in the way of truly experiencing the care of Jesus in connection with Him.
“Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone?”
Martha was an amazing servant who opened her home to Jesus and the disciples. But maybe at times she too felt sad, left out, and lonely.
Jesus didn’t answer harshly, or tell Martha to stop complaining or whining. Jesus listened to her and spoke tenderly to her. Jesus knew her true need. And it wasn’t help in the kitchen.
He cared for her soul, inviting her to choose the good portion – fellowship with Him!!
At times I am like Martha, serving and striving, and not willing to admit that I feel sad or lonely. That maybe I need to stop and sit at Jesus’ feet, and accept His Love and care for me.
My prayer for all of us who can relate to Martha, is that we will recognize and accept the lavish love Jesus offers, especially in seasons of grief, sadness, and loneliness. We are safe to bring our feelings to Him. Jesus says,
“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)
Lord, may we choose closeness with You– the good portion - and experience rest for our souls. Amen!